Self-Love. I’ve read these words on numerous websites and social media pages. But I never really took much notice of it because I thought that I’d done a pretty good job of loving myself.
I thought that because I feed my body well with really healthy food, I put toxic chemicals in and on my body as infrequently as possible, drink clean spring water, exercise often and read empowering books, that I was doing the act of self-love.
In actual fact I had been talking fairly negatively to myself, putting pressure on myself for various different reasons, comparing myself to other people’s highlights on social media. And that can virtually out-way everything else that I had done which is good for me.
Below I’ve paraphrased out of a book written by Michael Neill titled ‘The Inside Out Revolution’:
“We seem to have an innate desire to know ourselves at deeper and deeper levels. For most of us this begins with our own individual psychology. This self-awareness can soon turn into self-consciousness, and each new aspect you learn about yourself is often coupled with a judgement. We then try to fix our faults and improve ourselves which turns into a struggle against ourselves, and we spend months if not years trying to be the person we think we should be. When really what we find out is that most of what we thought was wrong with us is simply a part of the human condition.”
I’ve been down this road and been my own biggest critic.
For me self love is taking the time in getting to know who you really are, what you really like and don’t really like, what you value in your life and in those around you. It is getting to know your quirks and accepting them as a part of who you are, as well as looking after the body you are living in. It is limiting the negativity surrounding you on social media and the mainstream media and feeding your mind with joy as much as possible.
It is listening to yourself/Inner Being/Intuition rather than what a hundred different people online think you should be doing. It may have worked for them but it may not really work for you.
We have given our power over to everyone else and have lost the ability to listen to ourselves.
Here are some positive phrases you can say to yourself:
* I recognise that awareness is the first step in healing or changing. I become more aware with each passing day.
* I value myself.
* I love and approve of myself.
* I am willing to love and approve of myself. (If the above is too difficult to say for now)
* I am my own best friend. I love what I see in me.
* I am perfect for just being me.
A question I have found really helpful is:
What would someone who loved themselves do?
When you love yourself everything else around you reflects what you are feeling inside. When you take care of yourself first, you have more with which to give to others.